Coming Full Circle

Life can be funny sometimes.

There are definitely times when you go with the ebb and flow of life. And there are times when you are so used to going with the flow and surrendering to ‘the way it’s always been’ that you rarely stop, look around and ask yourself, “is this it?” Is THIS what life is all about? Is THIS what I’m supposed to do? Am I happy? I think we oftentimes get so used to a schedule and a routine, that we don’t even realize we’re circling around life, rather than living in it.

I founded Tranquil Blue in 2015. I made it official and went public with it in 2016. I remember hitting the ‘publish’ button on my Tranquil Blue Facebook page. I was so nervous! I was literally shaking. I had butterflies in my stomach and felt a little like I may vomit. Too much information? Hahaha. That day was a major turning point in my life; of course, I didn’t realize it at the time. I thought I simply took a scary step forward. Mmmm, hmmm.

Looking back, I now know that I had decided, when I hit that publish button, that there was something I HAD to do. I could feel it. It felt so scary, yet, amazing. I couldn’t not hit the publish button. I had finally learned what I REALLY was meant to do in this lifetime. I had found my joy, my love, my passion and it felt freaking phenomenal!! BUT…yikes. Scary, too! I had finally decided to surrender to what was meant for me.

I think people change. People can choose to change. I chose to change my path, my course in life.

This was me growing up: An honor grad, athlete, and a working high school student. I did all the things a typical high school kid did. After high school, I went to college and changed my major three times. I settled on teaching as my major. I earned my bachelor’s degree, followed by my master’s degree. I started teaching at Calumet High School in 2003 and I loved it, until I didn’t.

I never really thought outside the box (of life/career/job) much before 2015. I was content with my job. I never thought much about what else I could be doing. I knew my schedule. I knew how things would go. I was comfortable. I knew what was coming, but I was not entirely happy in my work anymore. Something was shifting inside of me. Something was starting to push to the surface. I never really questioned things about my job, until this gut feeling started to make me pause and ask myself, “Am I happy here?” After 19 years in the same job, I had gotten used to the same ole. No surprises, just the same. For some reason, however, this same ole, day to day schedule began to feel less safe and comfy. It began to feel restrictive and suffocating. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was meant to do more. I felt a shift and began to listen to my gut more. I began to question things. I began to recognize my boredom with the same schedule day after day, year after year. I decided to listen a bit more to these feelings of “I don’t want to do this anymore.” I began to question my level of joy in my job. Was I happy? Was I making a difference? Was I meant to do the same job for 30 years? I was very happy being a teacher in the school, until I wasn’t. As I swirled around these questions, my psychic gifts began to amp up more. It’s as if my Soul was coming alive again, trying to push me into my next step. But boy oh boy, was I scared. I struggled more with my days at work. I could feel my joy leaking away day after day. I knew it wasn’t fair to me or my students to stay in a place that no longer brought me the joy it once had. I tucked away these feelings for another 3 years, until I decided it was time to step away. I resigned from my school teacher job in June 2022.

Up until 2019, things were okay at work. I did my job and went through the motions. What I didn’t realize was when I said yes to Tranquil Blue in 2016, I said yes to me, the real me, perhaps a new me. I had changed.

I was at Calumet High School last weekend for the 2nd annual Wellness Fair. I was invited to attend this fair in 2019, but at the time, I was too afraid to be seen. I was still teaching fulltime at Calumet High School. I declined the invitation to attend the wellness fair in 2019 because I was afraid. I wasn’t ready to put myself out there. What would people say? What would people think? After all, I was still a Middle School and High School Health and Physical Education teacher. I couldn’t be a psychic medium too. Could I?

Remember, I had been doing psychic mediumship work on the side since 2015, but it was on the downlow. There were looks and whispers about my ‘hidden’ Facebook page (it wasn’t really hidden; I just didn’t openly talk about it at work). I was afraid. I wasn’t ready to be judged. I wasn’t ready to say, “This is me!” I was afraid to be seen. I was afraid to talk about my gifts. I was afraid to be me; the real me! I was afraid for a long time, until I wasn’t.

I began to realize that I really loved working with my clients. From helping them connect with their deceased loved ones, to connecting them to their own inner spark, to leading them to taking actions steps toward their life dream/purpose/passion, to answering their questions, to teaching spiritual courses, to leading women’s retreats, I was loving it all. This was the real me! I was helping people!

I began to step into the public eye more. I started to share more of me and the gifts I was blessed with. I became more vocal and visible with Tranquil Blue. The fear was still there, but I decided it would no longer run my life. And guess what? Once I decided to be me, the real me, I began to find my people and they began to find me. I decided to let go of the illusion that I, #1) Needed everyone’s approval and #2) That I needed everyone to like me and believe in what I do. I don’t. I know what I know. I believe what I believe, and that’s me. I gave myself permission to be ME! No more hiding. No more pretending. No more going through the motions. No more living the same day, week, month, year after year after year. I was done with that!

A very big aha moment came after I listened to a podcast by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer. He taught me that you’ll never get 100% of the people to like you and approve of you 100% of the time. So, stop trying. Why not approve of yourself?! DO you. BE you. It’s your life, after all. Yes. It. Is. Thank you, Dr. Dyer. I read you loud and clear.

So here I am, being me at my former place of work. Here I am, being me, doing psychic medium readings in the gym that I called my career/home for 19 years. I chose to step away from teaching at school, and I haven’t looked back. No regrets. Today, I was not afraid to be me. I was not afraid to be seen. I was not afraid to walk into that gym, the gym I spent many hours in, teaching and coaching, and be me. I am happy again! I am doing what I love. I am doing what I was meant to do. I know it! And guess what? People saw me. People paused, stared and walked by. People asked me questions. People chatted with me. People sat with me for my mini readings and it was amazing!

Being in that gym for the 2023 wellness fair felt so surreal to me. It felt like such a full circle moment. Here I had sat for 19 years doing one thing and now, here I sit for hopefully another 19 years, doing my new thing.

It’s worth it to step away and into what lights you up. It’s worth it to take that leap. I don’t want to regret anything in this lifetime, do you?

What would you like to step into fully in your life? Are you ready to come full circle? Are you ready to trust yourself and take that leap? I think it’s about time you gave yourself permission to BE you! Don’t you?

If you’d like to dive deeper into this, connect with me! I know exactly how you feel. I’d love to help you come full circle, too!